To be fair, day 2 is a repeat of day 1. I’ll be doing the introductory program for a week before moving to the next level. There’s no reason for me to push myself so hard that I get discouraged and quit.
The introductory exercises are gentle and formulated to “wake up” muscles that haven’t been used in a long time. Having said that, I feel the stretch that I’ve done the first two days.
Tonight I joined a group meditation session on the Headspace app. I don’t know what I was expecting, but it was a session just like any other, but there were approximately 45 other people taking part.
The only voice was the group moderator. Like I said, if it weren’t for the other people participating, it would have been just like any other solo meditation. The amazing thing is that as I relaxed and really got into the session, I could sense the presence of the other people. It sounds crazy, but I genuinely felt that I wasn’t alone. It was a wonderful feeling that I hope to experience again.
I’m starting yoga. Again. I had started practicing about a year ago until I was in the hospital off and on for the last four months of 2020. I was beginning to feel the benefits of yoga, but that ground to a screeching halt.
I have regained as much strength as possible since January, and I feel ready to start my yoga journey again. I’m humble enough to start at the very basic level once again. I will take things slowly, and focus on my technique and doing things right, not just racing through things.
I’m prepared to fail in the first few attempts because my endurance is very low, but I’ll keep after it until I complete the beginner course and then move on to the next course. One of my meditation lessons is all about failing better each time I try something new, because that is how you succeed in the long term.
Last year, I was using the DDPYoga app. For some reason I cannot get it to work this year, so I’m moving to the Glo app. It fills the requirements I need, so I’ll give it a shot. I prefer to start yoga at home by myself before attempting it in a group setting. There is a studio nearby that I can use, but my self-confidence is lacking right now. The last thing I want is to take my out-of-shape self in front of a bunch of other people.
I could certainly use some inspiration from others who are practicing yoga. Tell me your story.
“A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.”
• Arnold H. Glasow
A true friend is hard to find, and more valuable than all the gold in the world. A true friend will be the one you can count on, and someone that can count on you, because true friendship is a two-way relationship.
The meditation session today ended with this quote from Jimi Hendrix. He knew what he was talking about. He brought forth such incredible music because he learned to listen to his inner voice.
I’m still getting in tune with my own inner voice. Not the angry one, I’ve listened to that one far too much in the past. I’m searching for that calm inner voice that will lead me to peace and tranquillity in my life and mind.
Saturday was a cold, damp, and all-around miserable day here. We didn’t leave the apartment at all. My sinuses were killing me with congestion and either sneezing or blowing out great gobs of crap when I blew my nose. Things got to the point where I used oxygen for the first time in weeks, other than sleeping. It helps keep my nasal passages open so I can breathe.
I was sitting in my chair, inhaling oxygen, and I remembered not that long ago when just doing this simple task exhausted me. I’ve come a long way, but I know I’m still fragile.
For some reason, I’ve had flashbacks over the last few days about my time in the hospital. I hope this isn’t a precursor of things to come. I’m monitoring my health as best I can, and I’ve been concerned over the last few days that something isn’t quite right. I’m examining my legs and feet daily, and I asked Hal to do so as well. I’m afraid that my kidney function might be decreasing again. I have an appointment with the urologist later in June, but if things go wrong, I’ll try to get there as soon as possible.
Something like this doesn’t scare me anymore. I’ve been through too much to let stress kill me now. When Hal came into the living room, the first words out of his mouth were, “Why are you on Oxygen?” followed by “Why didn’t you say something?” I’m lucky to be with Hal. These 21 years are the best in my life, and I want a lot more years with Hal.
My main goal for today is straightforward. Do NOT bend over for any reason at all today. I bent over yesterday morning to empty the clothes hamper, and I regretted it for the rest of the day with bouts of vertigo that kept wiping me out.
I don’t want or need to feel like that today. We have a trip to the grocery store to do curbside pick up and a few errands that we need to take care of today. We don’t want to be out anytime after dark because there will always be idiots out drinking and driving. After all, it is New Year’s Eve.
We have no plans for tonight other than to be here with each other, and that is more than enough to make us happy.
Today I will be pushing for 2500 steps as I continue to work myself back into better physical shape. Today marks the two-week anniversary of coming home from the hospital.
I was so damn weak when I got home. The only thing that I could do was to wrap myself in blankets and sit in the chair in the living room. I could barely stand up without almost falling over. It was impossible to do anything without Hal’s help. I was utterly dependent upon him for everything.
Eventually, I felt my strength begin to return, and my appetite slowly emerged. I had lost more than 20 pounds in the hospital, and that had weakened me more than I realized. It was nearly a week before I had the strength to stand in the shower to clean myself properly and feel clean again.
Hal put me on a sensible plan to recover from all of the issues. The project seemed relatively weak at first, but I quickly found out that I was in worse shape than I thought. The modest goals were achievable without exhausting myself. Getting too tired every day would just have discouraged me and slowed my progress, if not dropped altogether.
I wasn’t even allowed outside the apartment until the end of the first week. Even then, I was only allowed to walk to the car and start the engine to make sure it would work. I went to my appointments with Hal via Uber. Hal let me drive to the grocery store and wait for him in the parking lot a few days ago. Now I am allowed to make short trips on my own because I am stronger than I was before.
The real way I can measure my progress is my step count. In two weeks, I am up to 2500 steps per day and feeling great. I will try for 3000 steps as my next goal. Ultimately, I want to reach 10,000 steps per day. I will get there eventually.
I can’t stress emo that none of this would have happened without Hal. He is my soulmate and my partner on this journey through life. In fact, in just one week we will celebrate our 21st anniversary.
I tell Hal every day how much I live him and how lucky I am to have him in my life.