Bored

    This is one of those days when I wish we had never heard of Coronavirus or COVID-19. Social distancing is hard, and there are days like this one when I long to get out. Sadly since I am in a high-risk category, it is safer and more advisable for me to stay at home.
    I cannot afford to run unnecessary risks. I understand why some people throw caution and common sense to the wind and venture out unprotected. I just cannot bring myself to justify that risk. A trip to the grocery store or pharmacy is about all we ever do anymore.
    I would love to go to Best Buy to look at electronics again. I want to go and try out mattresses since I want to upgrade the one I have. Sadly, neither of those things will happen anytime soon. Neither will a nice dinner out at a restaurant in town.
    At least I can take comfort in the fact that Hal and I are safe and well. The Stooges are happy, and I love to cook. Having said that, I do give upon and order delivery or take out every once in a while because I can only eat my own cooking for just so long!
    At least the weekend is here. There are of course, no plans, but that is the new normal. Not even plans to drive around and see whatever there is to see in this new town and neighborhood we have lived in since April of this year. Staying home is the safest thing to do, just like wearing a mask, but it is far from the most exciting thing as well.

The Waiting

    With appreciation to Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, the waiting is indeed the hardest part. Whether I’m waiting for the workday to end, or waiting for the weekend to arrive, the feeling is still the same. The anticipation of something good is like a drug, but so is the waiting when you know that something bad is going to happen, just a different drug.

    My personal hangup is waiting when I don’t have to. Some things are so far off in the future that waiting will only make me crazy, and yet I find myself waiting anyway. I felt that when I was counting down the days until I left the Navy. I thought that period of waiting would never end, but eventually it finally did. The effort of just waiting at that time was physically exhausting for me. I have tried since then to not let waiting get the best of me.

    I’m waiting to pay off more debt before I do anything for myself. I know that this is the right thing to do, but I still find myself waiting for the effort to pay off and be over. I’m not as good at not waiting as I thought.

Realization

   Today, things became a bit clearer around here. The incessant speculation about when, if ever, things will get back to “normal” rages on. I have decided that personally, I am not prepared to entertain the idea of things returning to normal for at least another 18 months. I wish that I could be more optimistic, but I prefer realism to optimism at any time.

     I have watched the growing crisis in this country and I don’t see any way that things can return to normal in less than 18 months. We are dealing with a large segment of the population who refuse to accept reality or facts, about COVID-19. These are the people who we see at the grocery store or the pharmacy or the gas station, no mask in sight and often leading their children, who also have no masks. These people call the pandemic a “hoax” or talk about building immunity by not taking even the most basic precautions.

     There are already stories about “COVID parties”. I understand part of this. When I was a child, my classmates and I were often sent to other children’s homes when those children developed chickenpox, measles, or mumps. The key difference is that those diseases were well-known and the effects were understood. Getting those diseases was a part of growing up because there was no vaccine, but as I said, those diseases were well-known and almost never fatal. It was the best our parents could do to prepare us for adulthood. Then vaccines were developed for these diseases, and the parties went away. Having them start again is criminally stupid because there is so much that we still don’t know about the Corona-virus.

I still believe that the worst of the pandemic is yet to come. The fall and winter will be brutal, especially if schools are forced to open. The traditional flu season will simply be more devastating this year as COVID lingers. Obviously, the longer people wait to take this seriously, the worse things will get.

     Realization is an important part of life. I know that things are not great, but they will get better eventually. They will improve even more quickly if we all work together to make them better, instead of just blindly following whatever bullshit the Nazi In The White House tells us.

Boring

There are few things as boring as waiting for your car the be serviced at the dealer. The very thought of it remind me of other ghastly necessities of life, such as trips to my dentist, or doing your taxes. Regardless, I find myself wasting a few perfectly beautiful Saturday morning waiting on my car at the dealer while observing the social distancing necessities and also wearing my mask. Thankfully, almost everyone is complying with best practices, although there was another Father with a young son and neither of them wearing masks.

I woke up earlier today with a baby migraine pounding away at the inside of my skull, and I know that a part of the birth of this little monster was the knowledge that I was going to be at the dealer and it’s my car this morning. Thankfully, I have one of those services agreements that covers most expenses, and the real reason for being here is nothing more serious than an oil change. Nevertheless, there will still be the service advisor frantically tracking me down with the dreadful news that something “unexpected” has come up and that my free service has suddenly escalated into a major problem spake with the corresponding astronomical price tag. For some reason, it was a miracle that I even got to threaded at all this morning, driving such a death trap. I’ve heard this all before. I just want the oil change completed so I can be on my way.

I have to admit my surprise when I was NOT subjected to the scenario I listed above. There was no litany of charges claiming neglect for my car, and because of my service plan, I was on my way without paying a single penny. I proceeded to the grocery store and picked up the ingredients for more homemade mashed potatoes (potatoes, sour cream, milk, butter, and some green onions), so I can make more tomorrow. I’m home now, feeling much better to be with Hal and the Stooges for the rest of the day. I’ll put in some practice time on my guitar later and just enjoy a beautiful Saturday after a rushed start.

Things To Come

    Each day, we see new record cases of COVID-19 here in the United States and we just shrug our collective shoulders and act like the problem doesn’t exist anymore. The refusal to accept reality should be surprising, but it isn’t, not anymore.    As most of the world has taken the necessary, and often, painful steps to combat the pandemic, the United States has resisted making the truly tough choices because of greed. When other countries decided that life was more important than money, they reacted with determination and resolution to get the pandemic under control.    There was no sacrifice too great. Nations closed down except for essential services. The US attempted to act , but “essential services” to us meant we still had to have our fast food and our Walmarts open.    Other nations mandated the wearing of masks. Not the good old USA, no sir. We won’t be told that we must do anything because that infringes in our freedom! This insane response is uniquely American. It reminds me of another issue where the obsession with “freedom” at the expense of actual liberty puts thousands of lives at risk.    We are treating COVID-19 and the pandemic the same way we treat gun violence. Just accept the losses and move on rather than even attempt to solve the problem in the first place! Every year we tolerate the loss of tens of thousands of American lives so some people can have their precious guns. Apparently, we will now tolerate the loss of HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS of American lives just so some people won’t have to wear a GOD DAMN MASK or practice social distancing because COVID-19 is a hoax that somehow only they are smart enough to recognize.
    We never need fear another country taking us over, we will fall because of our own FUCKING IGNORANCE!! Guns and COVID-19 will be the new acceptable losses we will endure as long as we listen to stupid people in the first place!

I Still Got It

 Yesterday, I cooked pork chops in the Instant Vortex air fryer. They came out wonderful and delicious! Good to know that I can still throw together a meal with the best out there. I have always loved to cook, ever since I was a child when Mom taught me to cook for myself to a) keep her out of the kitchen as much, and b) to teach me self-reliance. I cherish those lessons to the very day.

A Special Day for a Special Lady

     I have written about the difficulties I have faced in dealing with my family through the years, particularly on my Mom’s side. However, today June 22nd is a very special day for my cousin on my Dad’s side. Edna June is 89 years young today! She is one of the sweetest and most unassuming people I have ever met. She has told me about things I only read about. She told me about growing up and remembering the Great Depression and WWII. She told me a story that really resonates today.     

In 1961, Edna June traveled to Europe on vacation. When she returned to the US, she made a stop in New York City for 2 days. When she was preparing to leave for Kentucky, she was at Grand Central Station in New York, waiting for her train. She went to the ladies room and as she was washing her hands she noticed a Black woman using the sink right next to her. She told me that there in that place, 3 years before I was even born, that she had a revelation. The woman noticed her looking and asked Edna June what was the matter?     

Edna June told me that she looked at the woman and smiled before saying “Absolutely nothing, I just had a moment of truth strike me”. The Black woman asked what she meant and Edna June told her about being raised in Kentucky during the 1930’s through the 1950’s and never once realizing that she was the beneficiary of privilege simply because she was White. Edna June told the woman “This is the first time I have ever been in a public restroom with a Black woman, and I realize that there is nothing wrong with it. The problem is with how I was raised.”   

 Edna June said that the woman looked stunned before smiling and hugging her, saying that she had never witnessed someone confront and overcome their own prejudice right in front of her eyes. She and Edna June had a cup of coffee and talked until their trains were announced. Edna June returned to Kentucky a changed woman, she got involved with the Civil Rights movement and as a teacher, joined the fight to integrate the local schools.     

This wonderful woman in 89 wonderful years young today. Happy Birthday, Edna June!

A Breakthrough??

I managed to get some sleep last night. I also was taking detailed notes about how I was feeling and what my BG readings were. I woke up in the middle of the night once again with low BG and feeling like crap. This morning I went through my notes and I have decided to adjust my medication level downward to see if that will prevent the low BG from happening again. I don’t mess with my dosages very often, and only if it seems to be the last resort. Today is one of those times. I will see what happens tonight, and if things improve I will keep the new dosage. If I still wake up with low BG I will lower the dose more the following night before bedtime.     

I hope that my migraines are done for a long time. I spent the weekend fighting them off on both days, not the way I wanted to spend my weekend, to be sure. I think that my discovery and plan to adjust my medication dosage might go a long way towards solving the problem. I certainly hope so. 

Quiet Time

Sunday is slowly passing by. Thankfully, it has been a quiet day, and my migraine seems to have eased up considerably. For that reason alone, I’m grateful.

I’ve prepared some pork chops, and they’re marinating in the refrigerator. I will try cooking them in the Instant Vortex air fryer either tonight or tomorrow. That decision can be made later.

I hope that I can sleep well tonight and start tomorrow feeling refreshed rather than exhausted. We are home for the remainder of the day now. Hal The Cat is enjoying the balcony

Everything is quiet and peaceful.