Ignorance is Killing Us – Part 2 – Racism

    The second danger that we are facing now is Racism. I have been with my partner Hal, who is black, for more than 20 years, and in that time, I have learned a lot about how he sees the world as a black man. The things that he has seen in his life are frightening to think about for me. As a white man, I grew up with privilege that I never realized I had. To me, the local police were people I could put my trust in, especially in a small townh. I never thought that the black children I grew up with could have such a completely different view of the world, but after being with Hal, and then talking to some of the people I grew up with, I now know that the feelings of fear and distrust did exist even when I was a child.
    Those fears and feelings were never shared with me growing up because those feelings are deeply held in the black community. The common perception is that no white outsider can ever appreciate those feelings, that they would be called irrational or ridiculous. I never knowingly felt that way towards my friends, but I never realized that those feelings were being hidden from me either. My parents taught me as best they could to respect everyone, and to never look down on anyone. I am glad that those friends I had growing up never associated me personally with any of the problems that they encountered, but I wish that I had known about those problems so I could have helped to overcome them.
    As the number of murders committed by the police continue to grow, it becomes apparent that the real problem is ignorance. Pretending that this is a recent phenomenon completely proves the very point that my childhood friends, and Hal, have taught me. The problem has been around for over 400 years and is deeply rooted in our society. Slavery might have been outlawed, but the repercussions remain to this very day. White society has the remarkable ability to filter out unpleasant things and pretend that things are completely fine, unless the problems affect white society. This willful choice to be ignorant is a huge part of the problem.
    I am proud to be part of the #BLM movement, but I can never speak for  those directly affected. I can only speak from the perspective of a white man who is woke and proud of it. I choose to not be ignorant, because ignorance is killing us, all of us. To be silent is to be complicit.

A Much-Needed Break

Life has gotten out of control here over the last two weeks, and I have been struggling to find a way to get things back under control. Thankfully, these problems aren’t related to the COVID-19 pandemic, both Hal (person) and I are well. OK, not completely true for Hal since he is undergoing some extensive dental work, but that wasn’t totally unexpected.

Hal has been understandably cranky at times as he waits for new dentures to be fitted because he isn’t able to eat solid food and I’m making anything and everything that he thinks he can comfortably eat with extracted teeth and a sore mouth. Hopefully this will all be over with in a week, two weeks at the most. This must be awful for him, and I want everything else to be as perfect as possible for him.

This whole situation has worn me out. My yoga has lapsed, and I feel terrible about that. I am working several projects on the job, so I’m busier than normal there, but there aren’t enough hours in the day right now to get everything done and still have enough time to rest. The holiday weekend couldn’t have come at a better time for me, I have tried to deliberately detach myself from the distractions, my success rate is almost 50% I suppose.

We did get an air fryer this weekend, something we’ve wanted for awhile and now we have the room in our kitchen for it.

Because the air fryer made by the Instant Pot company, it should be very high quality and last for a long time.

Monday is dreary and cool. Exactly the type of day that matches staying at home. Only a trip to the grocery store will get me out today. My sinuses are giving me fits again today, with a severe headache. Hal (person) is resting and still recovering from dental surgery last Friday. I want to rest as much as possible today and try to start a productive short week tomorrow.

DDP Yoga Days 26-29

    I got so busy and tired that I neglected to make my daily entries about DDP Yoga. I have not stopped working out, but I have decided that I need to focus on getting more rest. Another factor is that because Phase 2 of the program is much longer per session so far, I don’t have time to work out in the morning and have to make time after work in the early evening. This is also the time when I am the most tired.
     Last night I finally forced myself to go to bed at around 2030. This is extremely early, but I know that I need to make this change to my routine so I can sleep better and longer each night. This change will also give me more energy and that in turn will make my workouts even better.

Irresponsible Behavior

Hal and I decided to grab dinner last night from the drive-thru at one of our favorite restaurants. We knew that the restaurant wasn’t open, but their drive-thru made it possible for us to grab dinner and bring it home. This is one of the repercussions of the pandemic. The important thing is to stay safe and to not put anyone else at unnecessary risk.

The line at the restaurant for the drive-thru was unbelievable. There must have been 20 cars in line ahead of us. We relaxed and eventually ordered, got our food, and then drove home. Our experience wasn’t bad at all, but we saw something that was rather disturbing while we were there.

Apparently, today marks the irresponsible attempt to reopen businesses other than drive-thru or delivery. Next to the restaurant we were waiting at was another restaurant where people were crowded at outside tables. Social distancing was obviously not being practiced, and neither was the wearing of masks except for the restaurant staff. The relaxation of rules states that outdoor dining is allowed. I personally don’t know what the capacity percentage or protective mask rules are

Honestly, seeing those people made me nervous. Were any of them carriers of COVID-19? Would someone contract the disease by being in a large unprotected group? While Hal and I take every precaution to limit contact to protect ourselves and people we have to interact with, such as the drive-thru workers, or the employees at the grocery store and pharmacy. What about the restaurant staff who had to interact with the people ignoring rules and protection?

I can’t see anything that justifies relaxing the rules so quickly while the number of cases and deaths are still rising. I see nothing to celebrate now. The celebration comes when we finally have the pandemic under control, and not before. It is irresponsible to treat some political stunt like “reopening” prematurely as something worth celebrating.

Everyone misses what we all took for granted before the pandemic, but we cannot wish reality away because it doesn’t fit with our desire for convenience. The experts are trying to warn us about this, but political pressure is driving the decision when science should be guiding us. I am afraid that these irresponsible actions will produce more cases and deaths, and will just prolong the pandemic.

Middle Of The Night

Waking up with low blood glucose isn’t a pleasant experience. For the second night in a row, it has happened to me, and I have to take the time to bring my blood glucose back up slowly so I don’t jump too high.

The recovery process is always the same. Take a measurement, then suck on a glucose tablet and let it dissolve in my mouth, then wait a few minutes and measure again. The process repeats until my blood glucose returns to normal. Depending on the severity of the drop in the first place, recovery can take up to 30 minutes, so I know that writing is a good way to pass the time.

At least the week will be halfway over after work ends later today. I’m sure that I’m going to want nothing more than to go to sleep once work is over this afternoon. The only interruption to my schedule might be spaghetti preparation this evening because I plan to make some for dinner.

I sometimes struggle to keep a positive outlook when I’m going through an episode like this. But then I remember the times that have truly been worse in my life, and perspective gives me calmness and peace. This is nothing that should upset me because no amount of worry or stress will make my diabetes magically vanish, it is something that I’ve learned to deal with.

Since I began this post, my blood glucose has just about returned to normal. I’ll wrap this entry up and post it before trying to get back to sleep.

Be Kind to One Another,

DDP Yoga Day 20

Honestly, I was glad that Saturday was a scheduled day off from my routine. I think I slightly sprained one of the muscles in my foot, although it isn’t really painful, I can feel it when I walk and the muscle along the inside of the sole of my foot feels like it is stretched. I’ve never felt this sensation before so I’m monitoring it closely.

I am not stopping my routine. I’m looking forward to next week because it is the last week of my introductory session.

My Own Private Idaho

It sounds strange, but in the midst of all the chaos and turmoil of the COVID-19 pandemic, I seem to be closer than ever to my own Private Idaho of Inner Peace. For whatever reason, things are falling into place with my life. There are still struggles, there always will be, but they no longer seem as insurmountable as they used to.

We moved on the first of April and have settled into our new place. As quiet as the last apartment was, this one puts it to shame. We are basically in the country in a medium size apartment complex, but without a major airport within 10 miles like the last place. Planes flew over all day and into the evening until 2300 or so each night. I don’t remember seeing vapor trails here in the sky since we arrived.

My sinuses acted up immediately after we arrived here. There were several days when I began to think that we must have moved to the worst place in the world for my sinus problems. But after starting Yoga on a daily basis, I have gotten better rather quickly, and I am sleeping better at night as well. I cannot describe how much better I feel.

Hal and I have not had any problems with the new neighbors. Everyone here is in the same situation as us with regards to the world situation, and that gives us all common ground to stand on.

We will save money by living here. I am relaxing with the knowledge that I can pay things off without as much stress every pay period. Things got too damned expensive at the last apartment, we just couldn’t stay there.

So there you have it. My personal story although a brief one, about how I have found my own Private Idaho and Inner Peace.

Be Kind to One Another

DDP Yoga Day 19

Friday is here, and I wanted to sleep in this morning. I firmly believe that DDP Yoga has helped me to sleep better at night. Sleeping has been a major problem for me for a long time. I suffer from frequent bouts of insomnia, which is never nice.
In the last 3 weeks, I have started sleeping better. I am extremely happy about this and I am attributing it ti DDP Yoga. Anyway, I chose to get a few more minutes of precious sleep this morning, but I will get my workout in this evening so I don’t miss a day of working out.
Looking forward to the weekend here.

DDP Yoga Day 18

Mission accomplished, at least for this morning. Even though today was a scheduled off day, I wanted to continue with my workouts so I did the session immediately after waking up this morning. Unless something happens to stop me, I plan to do the workout again immediately after work. I feel awesome and I slept better last night. My sinuses are also clearing up, and that helps tremendously.
I am going to work out twice a day for a while because I think that I am up to the task. I have one more week with the basic course before moving on to the next set of exercises. I am glad that I started at the beginning so I was able to get my mind in the right place to keep moving forward. Mental attitude is very important with something like a workout routine, and DDP Yoga is no different.

Congested

I wish I could have my sinuses surgically removed. There, I said it. I am so tired of going through boxes of Kleenex (when I can find them) and pushing out what seems like tons of drainage only to have my sinuses fill back up immediately.

I am tired of sneezing. At least I’m at home, because if I have one of those trifecta sneezing fits I would choke on the crap caught in my face mask. Not to mention everyone around me would demand that I be sent to solitary confinement because this simply must be more than allergies and sinus congestion.

A nice steady day-long rain would help wash away most of the damn pollen that is causing my discomfort. Unfortunately, we haven’t had that type of soaking rain in weeks, just light showers.

Each year my allergies get worse. I would go to the doctor, but the timing of our move and the Coronavirus pandemic mean that I haven’t found a new doctor yet and the last place I want to go to right now is a place full of sick people.

The Neto pot will have to work overtime for a while longer. Eventually things will get better.