Something Good

Here’s he weird thing. I slept like a rock for the last two nights here in the hospital, and woke up feeling somewhat stronger the next morning. Last night I couldn’t sleep at all and I am awake feeling stronger than ever on a Saturday morning. I wish I knew the answer to all of these mysterious questions that life tends to throw at us when we least expect them to.

At any rate, I am happy to feel as well as I do this morning and will be happy to see Hal sometime later today. I’m not exactly sure when he will be coming down, but I do know that he will be making the trip at some point probably in the later part of the morning. Today is the last day he will visit until my surgery on Monday morning. With good luck, I will be discharged by next Wednesday and I can finally go home for the first time in the month of December.

Typing that last part if the previous sentence really hurt me. If I go home on Wednesday, that means that December 16th will be the first day of the month that I will actually be at home. I keep trying to wrap my mind around that sentence to make it fit into what should be normal reality, but it is taking time to process completely.

On the personal side, my request for short-term disability was officially approved yesterday. I still don’t know when the auxiliary paycheck will arrive, but that now becomes less of an issue because I know it will come through. I know that this will be a very barren holiday season because the money is so tight, nut at least we are finally getting some help.

I can almost allow myself the luxury of thinking about seeing Hal and The Stooges once again, all together at home. Of sleeping in my own bed again, of not being ruled by a constant round of checks and vital signes being taken, of sub-par meals (at this hospital), of arguing with doctors about my diabetes treatment which always works once they all it to start after several days of no success. I can think about cooking once again for myself and Hal. I can think about the new apartment that we are signing the lease for very soon for a move in March. The new place will be exactly that and will be much less susceptible to mold like the place we are in now.

Most of all, I want to finally be able to focus on the real recovery effort and physical therapy that willn be requiered once I am out of the hospital. That will take a while to accomplish, and I know that it will be worth the effort when it is complete. I just need to avoid another series of trips to the hospital every 2-3 weeks, at least through the winter months. I want to be strong enough to have that resistance. Actually, I never want to see the inside of another hospital room as a patient again in my life after this.

Hope that today is the start of something good for a change.